Separated Under One Roof

ByAbhitha Ahilya

Couples’ separation while living on the same roof is a challenge. However, with a plan, you can live with your ex peacefully.

Almost 50 percent of all marriages in the United States and Europe end up in divorce or separation. Some of the divorced go their different ways, while others decide to stay under one roof for various reasons. Living under one roof can either be long-term or short-term. For many people, the idea of living with your ex might be pretty daunting. However, there are several reasons why you may decide to live under one roof despite the circumstances. Some of the reasons include.

  • Financial reasons

While divorcing people may decide to live apart, financial pressures may stop them. This is usually the case if they cannot afford to live apart until they sell their primary household. Usually, people take a mortgage, but in such a case, the income of both partners is considered. This way, both will continue to pay the mortgage since one of them may be unemployed.

  • Finding it hard to find alternate accommodation

Finding a new home or apartment can be tricky; hence will take time. This is usually the case if you are looking for a place close to your work or your kids. It can also take time to purchase furniture and other equipment you require in a house if you especially don’t have the money.

  • Stability for your kids

Separation can be challenging for you as well as for the kids. You, therefore, may decide to stay with your ex as you come into agreement about parenting your kids. This way, you and your kids will have a place for the transition to co-parenting. In addition, your kids will adjust to the straightforward routine, which will become a two-household family.

If you want to apply for a divorce, you may need to prove to the court or separation lawyer Adelaide that you do not have any relationship with your ex whatsoever. However, doing this is pretty tricky, but you can indicate the following;

  • Separation date

It would help if you were separated from your ex for one year before applying for a divorce or get in touch with separation lawyer Adelaide. Your separation date is essential, especially if you will go through a property settlement. In such a case, you may need to know the date to determine how much you will get from your settlement.

  • Changes 

It would help if you showed the changes that have occurred since your separation. These changes include;

  • Separating finances despite living in the household

This is very critical in showing you are not in a relationship with your ex. Of course, this step is necessary in any case of separation, but it’s a piece of evidence when living under one roof. It also shows independence. It involves you and your partner closing joint bank accounts, agreeing on how bills will be made, and the will or life insurance beneficiaries.

  • Sleeping in different rooms 

The court, in most cases, would like to know how you share your household rooms. Do you share the bedroom? How do you share your bathrooms and living space? How are house maintenance responsibilities arranged? This will answer whether you are in any relationship with your ex or not.

  • Changes to social aspects of the relationship

This shows whether you and your ex identify yourselves as independent or as a couple. If you are separated, you may need to inform your family members about it. Also, in the case of social functions, you attend them separately.

Other points under this factor include whether you spend your holidays separately or together and if you represent to the schools, banks, real estate agents, or the government as a couple.

  • Presence of a sexual relationship

A sexual relationship with your ex indicates you are still a couple. But the presence of it will show there is no relationship between you two.

  • Commitment nature

The separation will make you and your ex create physical and emotional space. Therefore, you need to show the court that there are no cases of commitments between you two. Commitments may include giving company, intimacy, emotional support, any together plans in the future, and the ability to support the other partner in case of a family crisis.

However, calling a doctor or ambulance in a medical emergency does not show continued commitment in a relationship.

It would help if you informed your kids of the separation in case it happens. However, it’s essential that you do this together and not separately. Inform them that you are organizing to stay in different houses and about the thought of co-parenting. Ensure you tell them the separation is between you as parents, and they are not responsible for any of it. Additionally, plan time with your kids so as they are not in the middle of your conflict.

 The separation between partners is joint, but how you deal with it is what matters.