In a world filled with some of the most mind-blowing technological achievements the human race has ever seen, a concept as simple as good parenting is still a mystery to many.
Lots of parents around the world simply wing it as they go. It is often said a child does not come with a manual and this has proven to be true in more ways than one.
However, psychologists and other experts in the field have come up with a universal frame which classifies the various common parenting behaviors and patterns into categories based on their characteristics.
Coined in the 1960’s by Diana Baumrind, a developmental psychologist from the University of California at Berkeley, the model was later improved and expanded on by psychologists Maccoby and Martin in the 1980s.
The frame identifies 4 main parenting styles:
- Authoritative Parenting
- Authoritarian (or Disciplinarian)
- Permissive (or Indulgent)
- Neglectful (or Uninvolved)
Each of these parenting philosophies bears distinctive traits and causes various outcomes in the child.
These parenting styles have been studied for over 25 years and results for each parenting style are often found to be as predicted.
According to Baumrind’s, parenting practices and children’s conduct are closely related.
The parenting approach chosen can have an impact on how children develop and perform.
The 4 different types of parenting styles and their benefits and drawbacks.
Parents that are considered authoritative have high standards for accomplishment and maturity, but they are also friendly and accommodating.These parents establish standards and uphold boundaries through open dialogue, advice, and rational justification.
These parents give their children explanations for their deeds, explaining things gives kids a sense of awareness and teaches them about morality, values, and objectives. Their disciplinary techniques are confrontative, which means they are logical, negotiable, goal-oriented, and focused on controlling conduct rather than coercive behavior.
The Characteristics of Authoritative Parenting
According to Baumrind’s studies on parenting methods, children of strict and authoritative parents have a propensity to:
- Act joyful and satisfied.
- Become more independent and active.
- Obtain improved academic results
- Create a positive self-image
- Interact with friends while displaying effective social skills
- Have improved mental health, with fewer instances of alcohol and drug abuse, delinquency, sadness, anxiety, and suicide attempts.
- Show fewer violent inclinations
Despite having names that sound similar, authoritative and authoritarian parenting approaches differ significantly in their expectations and methods of parenting.
Both parenting philosophies demand high standards, but authoritarian parents expect unquestioning compliance by citing justifications like “because I said so”.
Through stringent guidelines and instructions, they only permit one-way communications.
They perceive any attempts to reason with them as backtalk.
To maintain behavioral control, these parents adopt strict discipline and frequently resort to severe punishment, such as corporal punishment.
Their methods of discipline are coercive, which means they are arbitrary, prescriptive, domineering, and interested in establishing status disparities.
Authoritarian parents are typically not nurturing and are not attentive to their children’s needs.
Usually, their justification is that it will make their kids stronger.
The characteristics of Authoritarian Parenting
Children of parents who practice authoritarian parenting have a propensity to:
In this type of parenting very few boundaries are established by the permissive parent, and they are not willing to impose rules.
This kind of indulgent parents do not enjoy turning down requests from their kids or disappointing them.
They are strongly encouraging but not intrusive.
Their approach to discipline is anything but strict.
They only impose a few restrictions or none at all, and they typically let kids solve their own problems.
They are communicative and leave youngsters to make their own decisions rather than providing even the barest of advice.
This type of parent is typically affectionate and nurturing.
These parents often have little expectations or none at all.
The characteristics of Permissive or Indulgent Parenting
The worst parenting results often occur in children with permissive parents, they tend to:
Neglectful parents do not establish clear limits or have high expectations.
They are uninterested in their children’s lives and indifferent to their needs.
These absent parents may have suffered from depression, physical abuse, or neglect as children themselves.
They have low level of demand and minimal responsiveness as a whole.
The characteristics of Neglectful parenting
Children of neglectful and uninvolved parents:
Research from decades of studies consistently links authoritative parenting to the best results in children.
Psychologists and psychiatrists concur that the authoritative parenting approach is the most effective.
Results are typically found to be consistent with each parenting approach.
However, there are still significant discrepancies and outliers in some places.
It appears that other factors than parenting style also influence a child’s outcome.
Additionally, variations in the social environment and child temperaments may be relevant.
According to research, families from various socioeconomic (e.g., income level, education, number of active parents) and racial origins (e.g., Asian, Black, Hispanic) don’t always correlate the authoritative approach.
For instance, researchers discovered in one study that African-American adolescents who had authoritarian parents but no peer support did not perform at their best academically.
According to the same research, Asian-American students did best in school when they had strict parents and peer support.
The choices and results that parents make can also be influenced by how their children behave.
For instance, parents may choose a more authoritarian parenting style because they feel that their sensitive children are challenging.
According to a study, several aspects of a child’s behavior, such as sociability and aggression, are more closely tied to the temperament of the child than to the parenting style of their parents.
Additionally, these outcomes do not hold true for other categories of outcomes, such behavior or mental health.
Teachers play a crucial role in a child’s life, just like parents do.
Teachers are kind of like second parents who spend most of the day with their students when they are at school, therefore they have a big part to play in a child’s upbringing.
Teachers instill in kids the value of doing things.
They provide moral support and inspire them to treat everyone fairly and equitably.
They instill in a sense of the value of life and direct a child in the correct direction so they can develop the necessary skills to thrive in society.
What is taught to children at an early age will stick with them for the rest of their life.
A teacher can guide students as they develop into better individuals.
Young children frequently learn from what they observe.
A teacher sometimes has the power to lead a child in a certain direction irrespective of the parents.
Teacher can positively or negatively impact a child’s life no matter what yhe situation is like at home.
Many teachers have greatly impacted their students lives and shape who they become that’s why it is always recommended for teachers and parents to work together for the wellbeing of the child.
The contrast between parenting practice and parenting style is another factor that may have an impact on the outcome.
Parenting style refers to the emotional environment and level of control that parents provide for their kids.
Parenting practices are specific acts parents do to raise their children.
Even parents who use the same parenting strategy may opt for different methods or strategies when putting particular parenting practices into effect, which will have an impact on the degree of the results.
The importance of communication and cooperation between parents.
As your child gets older, communication has a significant role in how they interact with the outside world, and it all starts at home.
It can be challenging to communicate with children because you want to be honest while controlling conversations and themes that might harm or be irrelevant to the youngster.
Lack of explanations and uncertainty can make kids anxious and prevent them from understanding the importance of your expectations.
When children are given responsibilities, tasks, or communication with individuals outside of their family, open communication is especially crucial so that they may begin to comprehend the motivations behind actions and behaviors.
Giving evasive answers to queries, such as “because I said so,” is counterproductive since children will only associate certain behaviors with consequences.
The key is to avoid giving your child too much knowledge or placing too much pressure on them to take on too much at once, even though you want to develop a healthy, equal connection with them.
When you treat your child like a friend or an adult, the child may feel overwhelmed or develop problems with relationships and authority later on.
Keep conversations with your kids focused on: their fears and concerns, their learning and growth, and the values and tasks that you want children to learn about.
When you need to talk about greater issues, be sure to do it with your partner or friends.
It’s crucial to keep in mind the abilities required for your child to properly speak outside the home while you improve your communication skills with them.
Young toddlers in particular may avoid speaking to strangers entirely out of fear.
However, practicing in front of other kids and close family or friends could boost their self-assurance.
A wonderful example to follow is to always speak politely and openly whenever they are present.
Children are curious about “why”.
Giving them the “why” helps them understand things more clearly.
Does your kid understand the purpose of the chores? or understand the meanings of “please” and “thank you”.
Perhaps your kid doesn’t understand why you sometimes get annoyed or angry.
The most important lesson for any child to learn is how to communicate clearly.
Parents should pay more attention to the positive behaviors and less attention to the negative ones.
Express gratitude for their good deeds and talk with your child about how they comprehend and recognize the outcome of their actions.
Are the people around them happy? Have they been of any assistance?
Have they completed a task or helped with cleaning without the parent having to ask?
The more kids experience the benefits of excellent behavior, the more they’ll want to engage in it.
No matter how you look at it, parenting is challenging.
However, as parents, it is our duty to create happy, healthy, and independent kids.
When a child is given the right amount of discipline, support, and taught how to communicate effectively, they will cherish their relationship with the parent and understand the value of open discipline and communication out in the world.