Navigating Playdates and Birthday Parties

It’s often been said that children with autism don’t ‘do well,’ in social settings or playing with other kids. While that may be the case sometimes for some children, that’s not the case for all children. You’d be very surprised what a little support will do for children on the spectrum in social settings.

Playdates and birthday parties are the most common ways children interact with each other and socialize outside of school. These activities are fun for most children but can be a little overstimulating for a child with autism. However, that doesn’t mean your child can’t enjoy playdates or celebrate birthdays. 

As the parent of a child on the spectrum, there’s nothing more rewarding than seeing your child succeed in making a personal connection, and it’s very possible for this to happen. It just may require considerable practice and preparation. You’ll, of course, want to work with your child on certain social behaviors at home, but also consider seeking an Autism Therapy Center as well for additional help from trained and licensed therapists. This type of treatment will go well beyond birthday parties and playdates; It will help them retain the skills to succeed in life.

Whether you and your child are hosting a playdate or birthday party, or simply attending, here are a few tips on how to help your child navigate their way through stimulating events.

Be Sure to Select the Activity Carefully

Before any playdate, you’ll want to make sure you choose an activity to ensure your child enjoys it as well as the other child. One way to do this is to choose a playmate with similar interests. Talking to your child’s teacher or talking with other parents you know and finding out if having a playdate doing a specific activity would be beneficial to both children. Of course, you don’t want to force your child into a situation that makes them more likely to shut down, however, sometimes you have to give them a slight nudge to get them out of their comfort zone.

This same theory applies to birthday parties as well. Birthday parties can be very overstimulating for autistic children and cause them to shut down. If your child is invited to a birthday party, find out what activities will be going on that you know your child likes and have them participate in those activities. When you see them getting overwhelmed, you can leave but it’s always good to get your child around other children whenever you get the chance, as it helps them get more comfortable in social settings.

Practice How to Play in Social Settings

If you know your child has a forthcoming playdate or birthday party, it’s always a good idea to practice playing. Practicing things like sharing and taking turns, having them describe what certain hand gestures or facial expressions mean, and how to engage in conversation will all play a pivotal role in helping your child have a successful social experience.

It will also be very helpful to contact the parent or parents of the other child and talk to them about what they can expect during the time spent together. This conversation will include explaining behaviors your child engages in like hand flapping or self-talk. You’ll also want to remind them to be patient as well. 

Recognize When Playtime is Over

When it comes to children on the spectrum and socializing with other children, you have to be able to recognize when it’s time to call it quits. In your conversation with the other parent, you’ll want to let them know that the playdate may not be very long because your child may grow tired of playing. Typically, playdates last between three and four hours, depending on the activity, but for children on the spectrum, they may grow tired after an hour. 

This aspect is especially important at birthday parties. If you know your child enjoys crafts, and there will be crafts at the party, let them enjoy the crafts, even if it’s the only thing they participate in. When they’re ready to go, they will let you know. The last thing you want to do is force them to stay.

Preparation is Key

When it comes to helping your child cope in social settings like playdates and birthday parties, success is all in the preparation. Of course, there are techniques you can use with your child at home like working on sharing and taking turns, as well as working on verbal communication that will positively translate into real-world settings. However, professional treatment in the form of ABA Therapy is going to benefit your child in not just social settings but also in enhancing their problem-solving skills as well as their creativity and how they learn and think.

Consider this form of therapy for your child. The benefits extend well beyond birthday parties and playdates.

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